`Joo haven't been out here all night, right??': The Art of the Kill (The Professional)

Poor neighbors.

The guy who lives next door works night-shifts for NYPD (stealth), and he's had to step by me for the past couple weeks. We exchange words, lament the jackhammering below us -- and agree on the unfairness of life. Ha.

He just got home and said in his accent-lilted voice: "Joo haven't been out here all night, RIGHT?"

"No, sir, no! I just can't sleep. It's Sunday, though, so I'll be okay."

For some reason, the way we interacted and the way he spoke ... it just reminded me of "The Professional." I'd wanted to clip it after ref'ing Gary Oldman in The Contender, but figured it was too sensory overload.

Balding Eagle Eye

We waltzed out of an Upper West Side diner – well, I shouldn’t glamorize, it was more like a Hell’s Kitchen bar – and put a question to ourselves: What should we see?

Given that half of Hell’s Kitsch’s Italian mob brass had hassled us for half an hour, it seemed only right that we see an action movie. My friend was fine with that, given her shared taste of commercialized danger.

We walked to 34th St.’s Loews. Looking up at those beautiful blinking/scrolling lights, we had limited choices. Eagle Eye!

No, dios mio, no.

Alright, I’d already had it out for Shy LaBuff, (how dare people describe “Disturbia” as a Hitchcockian film???!!!!) but COME ON! This kid has neither the brains nor the brawn to pass for a sex symbol, and he has no business heeding the words of some secret school of people telling him to duck or move or skate on ice. He just doesn’t, and to continue to cast him in roles where he should suffice as so – it’s unfair.

“You just have to get used to him,” I was told.

“No, they just have to stop using him,” I retorted.

Please, film friend-os, stop using him!!

`You Start Disputin' My God, and You Got a Problem': Religulous

How dare I leave out my old flame Mr. Maher from the movie roundup?? "Religulous" comes out today, and I might go see it tonight.

I used to stay up every night in high school to watch Politically Incorrect, and tell my mother how one day I'd be his wife. "He's too funny looking, Morgan," was her oft-repeated response. It didn't matter, I loved his nerve and (obnoxiously) combative ways.

My feelings for him cooled long ago, but I'm psyched to see his movie.

This also reminds me of a movie I finally saw a few weeks ago, "Jesus Camp." It didn't have the same celebrity power behind it, leaving it too-little noticed. It's really great and really scary/depressing.

`A Woman Will Serve in the Highest Level of the Executive!'

I won't begin to indulge my own political musings here; they're mostly infused by thoughts from friends like Mr. Golis, and regurgitation's never seemed very attractive. Buuuuut I'd been anticipating last night's VP debate intensely, so it deserves a reference.

Consider Sen. Laine Hanson (Joan Allen) in "The Contender." She's being appointed VP after the death of the former second-in-charge; lots of hullabaloo surrounds her nomination, as would be expected. She's a LADY, for god's sake. (Difference between real-life and movie-life, however, is that she's respectable. Oops.)

Cue Gary Oldman as Shelly Runyon, the nasty and below-the-belt confirmation committee chairman who wants to see to it that Hanson never makes it to office. He unleashes the political hounds on her, videos of her "sexual deviancy" spread and the movie quickly becomes a modern classic for its genre.

I secretly hope we have a Shelly Runyon on old Joe Six Pack right now. (Oops, again! Contain yourself, Grice.)

(For some reason I can't embed it, but "The Contender" trailer is here.)

`Netflix teams with Starz to stream 2,500 movie titles' (!!!)

As if I didn't already sit in front of my computer or tv -- or both -- enough, I just stumbled across this good fortune:

Right off the bat, Starz's "Starz Play" lineup will contain hits like No Country for Old Men, Superbad and other recent hits. Can Netflix convince studios to release movies at the start of or during theatrical release? That would be a major coup -- but that's quite a paradigm shift for the movie studio industry as well.

Farewell friends, one step closer to reclusion.